Halloween 2013: The Return of Dr. Freightmarestein

I finally found a haircut that works for me!

For Halloween this year we returned to a classic neighborhood porch show: Dr. Freightmarestein and his haunted laboratory of horrors! There were two-headed monstrosities, hanging skeletons, howling wind and lightning flashes, and a babbling zombie baby who'd managed to confuse rat poison for candy (an adorably common mistake).

"But it looks just like skinny and sweet!"

Igor: "Your experiment is a success, master!"
Me: "Quiet, you!"

But the absolute star of the show was Jenny who portrayed the monster-run-amuck. Aided by my sycophantic assistant Igor (perfectly played by our lovely daughter Vienna), I gave the monster a 10,000 volt kiss of electricity, granting her life, life, life! - only to watch helplessly as the creature broke through her chains and burst through the caution tape, lunging heedlessly toward our guests!

"Hey! That device looks just like the car battery charger in our garage!"

"Candy for the children. Rawr!"

Only the gift of candy to the terrified children could distract the monster enough to save them. Turns out, the charging beast could only be calmed by the sight of smiling kids. Eventually the creature even learned to hand out candy and contain her desire to crush, kill, destroy! I'm happy to report that our guests survived the onslaught. But what horrors will next year bring?...

"Kids! Don't forget to take some candy!"

Now With Video Goodnesss!

• 2012: Pirate Dungeon II [Pix and Video]

• 2011: Just Buried II [Pix and Video]

• 2010: Alien Autopsy II [Pix and Story] [Video]

• 2009: Zombie Apocalypse [Pix and Story] [Video]

• 2008: Dr. Freightmarestein's Haunted Laboratory of Horrors [Pix] [Video]

• 2007: Psycho Circus [Pix] [Video]

• 2006: Alien Autopsy I [Pix]

• 2005: Just Buried I [Pix]

• 2004: Pirate Dungeon I [Pix]